2013 Wish List

As Christmas rapidly approaches, an even more important holiday lurks not too far behind. My birthday! Yes, that's correct with the New Year, my lovely parents ushered in a new baby. Did you know Amadeus and I share the same birthday (January 27th)? Anyway, my point is that I thought I’d make a little wish list in case you felt so inclined to get me a gift for my birthday or for Jesus’ birthday. Here goes:

The Clash - Sound System
I probably already have most of these recordings, but this set is too cool to pass up. I still remember how stoked I was when I bought The Clash on Broadway boxed set at Tower Records on The Drag. Now that collection pales in comparison to this beauty.



Black Milk Clothing
http://blackmilkclothing.com/
This online store has the best leggings of all time. They also have some pretty awesome swimsuits. They change the inventory a lot, but the Jaws swimsuit is amazing. Although, I’m not quit sure I’d ever wear a white swimsuit, the concept is great. Seriously, peruse their website. There’s something for everyone.



Clarisonic
http://www.clarisonic.com/
I’m not totally sold on this thing yet, but I’m willing to try it out. I’ve always had sensitive skin and no luck with fancy cleaners/creams. This sounds like a pretty good idea to me. I also have a hard time finding skincare products that are good quality and cruelty free. I keep coming back to this brush as my next option.



Cheese of the Month Club
I was joking the other day how I wished someone would buy me a membership to the cheese of the month club. The more I thought about it, the more into it I am. I love cheese so much! I’m talking about a fou de fa fah cheese club, not some Wisconsin cheddar bullshit from Hickory Farms.



Macaron of the Month Club
In keeping with the food theme, I also love French macarons. Good macarons are hard to find. A macaron of the month club is a perfect idea.



Dyson DC41 Animal Upright Vacuum Cleaner
I have two dogs, one is a pug, and they shed like crazy. The vacuum cleaner I have right now is just not equipped to handle that amount of fur. I need some heavy duty shit and after extensive research I think Dyson is the way to go. You know you’re old when you ask for home appliances.



60” Flatscreen TV
As they say, go big or go home. My 45” TV looks itty bitty in my much larger living room. It was fine for our tiny loft, but now I think we need an upgrade. On average, I watch about five films a week so I feel like I should have a larger TV to do so.



French Fry Holder
This sounds totally ridiculous and unnecessary, but if you knew how much I love French fries, you would understand. I know French fries are bad for you, blah, blah, blah, but I love them so much. About 80% of the time I am eating them in the car. This would be perfect for me!



Replacements Reunion
This is a doozie I realize. Three shows in September and not one anywhere near me. I was prepared to fly somewhere, but the timing just wasn’t right. And with having just adopted a new little one, it just didn’t seem feasible. I watched all the footage of the performances and could not believe how amazing they sounded. It’s like The Mats never missed a beat from their glory days. From what I understand, they had special lighting, laminates, and merch for three shows? That sounds to me like a full on tour is in the works. If anyone can make this happen, I pray to the whiskey gods that they do. I really really need this.



There you have it folks, my Christmas/Birthday list. Of course this is all in good fun. I really only wish for a safe & happy year with great friends & family. Except for that Mats reunion, I’m dead serious about that shit. Someone make it happen!

Merry Christmas to all of you out there!

Thanksgiving Dinner

Now that the holiday season is upon us, I wanted to take some time to reflect before chaos ensues and we all end up going ape shit at Target after hearing WHAM’s “Last Christmas” for the 10,000th time. I have a very small immediate family that I can count on one hand so our holidays were always really low key for us. There are never any cousins, crazy aunts, or rowdy grandchildren running amok (there are always dogs running amok). Sometimes I miss that experience, but for the most part I’m perfectly happy with our close little family. There are less people to offend.



I got to thinking about my ideal situation for a formal Thanksgiving dinner. What would it be like if I could invite anyone I wanted? I thought of ten people I would love to have over for my Thanksgiving dinner party. My guests are listed in no particular order and are narrowed down to real people living or dead. I left off fictional characters otherwise this would be the Whedonverse edition of Thanksgiving (that’s for another post). I left off Tarantino as I feel like he would dominate the dinner conversation. I also excluded Gary Oldman as I feel his staunch Republican ideas would be much too taboo for this crowd. It was really hard to narrow down my list to just ten people. I could name ten directors and actors alone. Anyhow here goes:



Gullermo del Toro
Del Toro is one of my favorite film directors hands down. He brings a beauty and awe to the fantasy genre that others only dream about. He also brought to life one of my favorite comic book characters, Hellboy. I’ve watched countless interviews with del Toro and he is so affable. His projects are made with such love and care because he is a fan first and foremost. His passion really shows through in his work. He would be the perfect person to carve the Tofurkey.



Elvira
Elvira is such an icon. Her beauty goes beyond her signature black dress and wig. I read a book by Pamela De Barres with a chapter by Elvira. She speaks candidly about her experiences with musicians including Elvis. After this short read, I was even more fascinated by the Mistress of the Dark. As a big animal lover, she is also a strict vegan. She would be responsible for bringing some vegan sides.



Joe Strummer
It’s hard to believe it’s been more than ten years since Joe Strummer left this Earth. I remember that sad day like it was yesterday. A little bit of the light in the world ceased when Joe Strummer died, but fortunately his amazing words and music live on. Growing up in the 80s I was well aware of The Clash, but I had yet to figure out what punk rock was. Once I made the correlation, it was like a spark went off in my head. I can never put into words how much The Clash affected my life. Even now, when I feel like a boring ass sell out, I just listen to London Calling and I still feel that same spark.



Patty Hearst
I have a strange fascination with Patty Hearst, much like John Waters. When I first heard the story of Patty Hearst, I couldn’t believe it. Imagine if someone like Paris Hilton (not to diss Patty like that) was kidnapped today and subsequently robbed a bunch of banks before the public realized she was suffering from Stockholm Syndrome. That’s pretty much what happened to Hearst. She was born into more money than 99% of us will ever know. My fascination also lies within the afterthought. Hearst dabbled a bit in acting, but mostly led a relatively quiet life after her short prison term. I recently came across her Instagram page and it’s mostly pictures of her grandchild & dogs, such normal things for an extraordinary life.



Bruce Springsteen
You either love The Boss or you hate him. I choose to love him. I indeed enjoy his music as I have a soft spot for almost any 80s music. However, The Boss is a rock icon. For all his success, he seems like such a down to Earth man. The kind of guy you can grab a beer with and just shoot the shit as evident with his cameo in HIGH FIDELITY. He’s also a great philanthropist who always contributes to charity. He’s a true working class hero who believes in power for the people.



Clive Barker
Barker has been one of my favorite writers as long as I can remember. When kids my age were reading Goosebumps, I was reading The Books of Blood. He’s created some of the most frightening yet intriguing characters in the horror genre. Where I feel like greats like Wes Craven have fallen from grace, Barker has been consistent with his films and books. He is still very active in the art world; his Tumblr page is filled with racy art photos. Sometimes it catches me off guard as I;m scrolling through pics of dogs then, BAM pics of dicks. Barker is still very involved with the Hellraiser comic book and writes another storyline (which I read regularly).



Bill Murray
Murray is hands down the funniest man alive. From stories I have heard, he also loves to party. Murray got pulled over in Switzerland a few years ago for driving a golf cart drunk. He just seems like a really fun guy to hang out with. Even after all these years of success, Murray doesn’t even have a publicist or a cell phone which makes him sort of an enigma. He would be on bartending duties at my dinner party. If anyone is keeping it real, it’s Bill Murray.



Robert Smith
Robert Smith has got to be the most wonderful person in the world and he’s written some of the most beautiful songs I’ve ever heard. I would love nothing more than just to sit & talk and maybe hug Robert Smith. Robert and I could eat cranberry sauce and trade pie recipes. He just seems so happy and pleasant to be around. In middle school, I had, “I heart Robert Smith” written on my shoes in permanent marker. I also had the lyrics to “Lovesong” scribbled on my binder. Seriously, he’s perfect and after all, he did save the world from Barbara Streisand.



Joss Whedon
You’ve heard me go on endless rants about how much of a genius Whedon is. It’s true; he’s brilliant and he has brought so much joy to my life. His charming sense of humor really shines through in his writing. However, since catching a glimpse of his interworkings via twitter, I’ve come to realize he’s as dorky as I am. I feel like we would be best friends. Maybe it’s just wishful thinking, but I know Joss Whedon would be awesome to hang out with and have over for Thanksgiving dinner.



HONORABLE MENTION
My Dad
My dad died when I was 16 years old and I still think about him almost everyday. In some ways, I’ve never gotten over that. I would just love to see what he thought about me now and the person I’ve become. I’d love for him to meet my dogs. I just wish I knew what he thought about everything. I still miss him very much.

There you have it folks, my ideal guest list for Thanksgiving dinner. My family isn’t as crazy as a lot of others so my actual guest list will be almost comparable to this one. I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday. No matter how you celebrate or where you go, remember to be grateful for your loved ones and the time you share together.

Happy Holidays

The Counselor

So I want to talk about THE COUNSELOR. I have heard nothing but bad reviews and negative remarks regarding this film. Even the Austin Chronicle gave it the same rating as the nü CARRIE remake which baffles me. I saw it and I enjoyed it! Before you call me biased, I will admit I am a Fassbender superfan. I can still offer a nonpartisan review without being clouded by his devastating good looks. For the record, I still have not seen X-MEN ORIGINS which starred Fassy as a young Magneto. Not even he can sell me on that shit.



I was excited to see THE COUNSELOR because I love Cormac McCarthy’s brilliant writing and with him behind the screenplay how could you go wrong? I generally despise Ridley Scott films (with the exception of ALIEN which is flawless), but for once he actually got it right. I’ll go ahead and accept this as an apology for PROMETHEUS. The cast of THE COUNSELOR is fantastic. I was a little unsure of Cameron Diaz, but she really put it all on the table (to say the least).



The film mirrors many of the same themes of NO COUNTY FOR OLD MEN (also written by McCarthy). It even takes place in Hell Paso, Texas. The film highlights a botched crime/foiled plan. In this picture, Fassy exists as the man with no name a la Javier Bardem in NO COUNTRY.



Many complaints I’ve come across claim the film is too dialog heavy which confuses the hell out of me. Do these people realize it’s based on a book filled with dialog? These are the same people who complain when there’s not enough dialog like with ONLY GOD FORGIVES (which I also enjoyed immensely). There are several scenes featuring various soliloquies which I think adds to the mystery of each character. Some questions are answered, but many more questions are raised. I really loved the whole perplexity of this film.



I’ve also heard people criticize the character development in THE COUNSELOR. I feel like this was intentional. This film centers on Fassy’s character; all other characters are secondary. The film presents the total descent of one man. We virtually see Fassy’s character go from a confident, charming, cunning man to a scared, broken, shell of a man in less than two hours. Watching Fassy take on this transition was really fascinating and I could not picture a better actor taking on this role. Again, I am biased as I would watch him act in a Wheaties commercial but that’s neither here nor there.



Diaz has been accused of overacting; again something I believe was intentional. Her character was meant to be over the top and extremely exaggerated. Her pronounced movements and monologues were intended to be hyperboles. I also like the parallel metaphors with the cheetahs. The symbolism of the hunt & chase was really beautiful. Similarly, Penelope Diaz’s character was very one dimensional, another calculated move by the filmmaker. Cruz’s character exists as a symbol for purity and the utter corruption that destroys that purity as a direct result of Fassy’s greed. As much as I detest Ridley Scott, nothing he does is unfixed (even if it does not make sense) and I really admire the way he unraveled this mesmerizing story.



One of my favorite writers, Bret Easton Ellis also enjoyed THE COUNSELOR. He said,

“I liked the bloody feel-bad nihilism of Ridley Scott's THE COUNSELOR, a much-needed rejoinder to "noble" and "humanistic" movies everywhere. There's so much self-righteous hatred aimed at THE COUNSELOR because it dares to laugh darkly at the "Victims Are Our New Heroes" culture...”

If anything, go see this film for the car fucking scene alone.

12 Years A Slave

Let me begin by saying that 12 YEARS A SLAVE was by far one of the hardest films to sit through. From beginning to end, it is completely horrifying. I watch a lot of films that would easily make others uncomfortable. We’re talking everything from IRREVERSIBLE, THE BRIGDE, CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST, DANCER IN THE DARK, and A SERBIAN FILM. None of those compared to the utter heartbreak I felt watching 12 YEARS. Having said this, I feel like this is the most important & powerful films of the year if not the last ten years.



12 YEARS A SLAVE tells the unbelievable, true tale of a free man (Solomon Northup) kidnapped and sold into slavery. I feel like this is far more appalling than being born a slave. For example, some would rather never know what it feels like to be rich than to have been rich then become poor. It’s the whole “ignorance is bliss” theory.



The film is based on the book written by Solomon just a year after his harrowing experience. It eloquently describes the life of a true slave in the Deep South. As you can imagine, there are not many accounts of day to day life as a slave. Sadly, many people did not live to tell their story or did not have the skills to translate into text. However, Solomon was not born a slave. He was a well educated, sophisticated family man who moonlighted as a talented musician. Yet, none of this matters when you are born with the wrong skin color at the wrong time.



The acting in the film is phenomenal as well as a beautifully written script. I’ve been closely watching director, Steve McQueen because I believe he is poised to become a force to be reckoned with. He was unfairly snubbed a few Oscar seasons ago with his controversial film, SHAME (also starring Fassy). I think 12 YEARS is a big “fuck you” to the Hollywood blowhards who run the film industry. I only pray this film receives the accolades it deserves.



Chiwetel Ejiofor who portrays Solomon Northup deserves an Academy Award, not just a nomination. He captures the pain and suffering of Solomon so vividly it’s scary. The most gut wrenching part of the entire movie was that Solomon never gave up hope. In a position when most people would beg for death, he continued to look for an escape. Although, we see a bittersweet ending, I was more disturbed by the afterthought. What became of Solomon? Can one really just go back to their old life? How does this mentally affect a person? Did his family search for him? How did they adjust and cope? None of these questions may ever be answered as the whereabouts and/or death of Solomon are still unknown. I think this is far more haunting as it leaves another story untold. This film will no doubt become the SCHINDLER'S LIST of our generation.



For once in my life, I am at a loss for words. The last time I felt really emotional watching a film like this was when I saw MILK in the theater. Without getting into a longwinded social commentary, I think this film comes at a time when it is the most relevant. Slavery may not exist anymore, but prejudice and inhuman conditions continue to thrive. Everyday I wake up with the intent to be the best person I can possibly be without coming off as a total asshole. I’m often discouraged reading or hearing about the pitfalls of humanity that constantly occur around the world. I hope that people watch 12 YEARS A SLAVE and realize this disregard for humanity is still prevalent. I hope it will make people think about the choices they make. We need to stop treating others like disposable property.

Gravity

I want to keep this as short and sweet as possible. I watched GAVITY a couple weeks ago and I really enjoyed it. I also watched it in 35mm as opposed to 3D which I thought was gorgeous. I felt like posting a brief review since I’ve come across so much hate and shit talk about this captivating film. I had been looking forward to GRAVITY since I really admire and respect Alfonso Cuaron. I’ve been a fan since Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN. I really wanted to see how his passion for life and brilliant way of exuding deep emotions translated into space. I must say I was pleased.



Some negativity I found was in the inaccuracy of the film. It’s funny how I did not see anyone breaking apart the inaccuracy and atrocity of ARMAGEDDON. So why scrutinize GRAVITY? There’s a reason why the genre is called Science Fiction. So what Sandra Bullock’s hair did not float in space? I did not pay money to see a scientifically accurate film based around mumbo jumbo that I could give a shit about. I paid money to see a film that said something. Who fucking cares which way the debris was supposed to be rotating? If you’re that concerned about accuracy, you need to stay home and watch shuttle launches on PBS by yourself.



I honestly do not think this film is about space. It exists in a separate category from 2001 and MOON. This film is meant to highlight the fear and isolation one experiences when faced with imminent death. GRAVITY does an amazing job of capturing this idea. MOON & 2001 do a similar job, but they take it to a different direction. Bret Easton Ellis said,

“the basic story in any movie is always, again and again and again and again, about one thing: loneliness.”

It’s meant to unfold the triumph of the human spirit. It’s about making a choice to carry on and the will to live.



I’m not crazy about Bullock or Clooney, but their performances were really great. I read an article how Bullock and Cuaron discussed in great detail (and rehearsed) her character’s breathing patterns. The goal was to translate her emotions through breathing. Details like that are incredibly subtle yet extremely important. Yes, it seemed mundane that Clooney would be instructing Bullock (a trained & seasoned physician) on oxygen conservation. Let’s think about this realistically. How many people are going to remember every single bit of training WHEN THEY ARE FLOATING AROUND IN FUCKING SPACE?!?!



What I enjoyed most about GRAVITY is that it centered on a woman which is sadly something you do not see very often in space or Sci-Fi. It’s about a strong courageous woman who not only survives extreme circumstances, but discovers a new lease on life. GRAVITY is the ultimate survivor story and probably one of the most suspenseful films I’ve seen in years. I watch films that make me feel something and GRAVITY did just that. I came away feeling anxiety, fear, relief, and dazed. I generally find myself fighting on the same side as science, but in this case they got it wrong. GRAVITY is truly an interesting and entertaining film.

Scariest Moment Of My Life

I try to keep this blog lighthearted and typically geared towards film. However, a couple weeks ago I had the most frightening experience of my life. It’s still a little hard for me to talk about it now, but I thought I’d share this unbelievable experience with you guys.





As most of you know, I’m a crazy dog lady. I love dogs almost to a fault. I've become my mother, the woman who can spot a dog a mile away and tell you exactly what breed it is, but can maybe read 2-3 lines on an eye exam chart. That's exactly me! I get along with dogs more than people and I obsess over my own more than some doting parents. I don’t have children nor do I plan on having children because my dogs are my kids. My nine-year old dog Spike is my entire world. We have been together through hell and back. In August I added Zira the pug to our family and it’s been a crazy ride ever since. I don’t care what any human parent says; I love my kiddos just as much as any human can love a baby.







Two weeks ago Ross was outside hanging up some Halloween decorations on our front porch. It was getting closer to bedtime so I decided to take the pooches out on one last stroll for the night. Usually I walk the dogs by myself since Ross is often at work or school. On this particular night, Ross offered to help me out. Ross took out Spike on his leash and I took Zira on hers. Spike and Ross went off to a patch of grass near our place just a few yards away. I started walking Zira in the other direction since she often gets distracted by what Spike is doing and forgets to potty. A few seconds later, I heard a growl and turned around to see a big black dog charging Ross & Spike.

Ross immediately started kicking at the dog to get away, but it was no use. The black dog (approx. 50-60 lbs) had Spike (20lb Chihuahua mix) by the neck and was violently shaking him like a chew toy. I started screaming and running towards them with Zira in tow. I took a couple swipes at the dog while Ross basically wrestled the beast. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Ross was able to get Spike loose. He promptly handed Spike to me and I ran as fast as I could carry two squirming, scared 20lb dogs. Who knew I was capable of He-Man strength? I was absolutely hysterical and never felt more scared in my life.

I checked Spike to assess the damage as he was in complete shock. My poor little guy had puncture holes in the back of his neck and a gaping hole in his neck/chest area the size of a silver dollar. You could see the muscle in his chest. Ross and the neighbors were able to call the police. As it turns out, a young woman who had recently moved into our complex was fostering a dog from a local shelter. She only had the dog for ten days and it just darted out of her apartment and ran straight for Spike.

We took Spike to the Emergency Animal Hospital of Northwest Austin. I cannot thank the entire staff enough. Ross and I were absolutely panic-stricken and everyone from the front desk to the technicians were incredibly patient & kind. They gave Spike some morphine, flushed out his wounds, and stapled him shut. Let me tell you that the emergency vet hospital is literally the saddest place on Earth and I hope I never have to go back. However, the whole trip was a lot smoother than any human ER visit I have experienced. In the event that an emergency occurs again, I will definitely go back to this hospital.

Ross had to go to the doctor as well since his hands were tore up from literally prying the dog’s mouth off Spike. Both Ross and Spike were put on antibiotics. The dog that attacked Spike was taken to quarantine. After that, who knows? I’d rather not know. We were lucky enough to have the rescue pay for Spike’s vet bill and the foster owner paid for Ross’ doctor visit.

Throughout the whole ordeal all I could think about was how I have not had enough time with Spike. I thought about the day I brought him home, his first Christmas, his 5th birthday party, and the time he ate an entire bag of Andy Capp Hot Fries. I just need more time with him! We were especially lucky this attack was not worse. I’ve read so many horror stories about violent dog attacks including Shawn Smith’s Remmy. Most of the time there is months/years of rehabilitation and mounting vet bills. In this situation it’s so easy to be angry and seek out blame, but I cannot do that. My little guy is ok and we are all going to be just fine. It’s really no ones fault this happened. I don’t blame the rescue; they’re just trying to save dogs. I don’t blame the dog; we don’t know his/her past. It’s really hard for me to have sympathy for the foster mom. I know she has experienced a lot of anguish over this too and I appreciate her taking responsibility. I just don’t want to have anything to do with her. I yelled several obscenities at her that night which is the least I could do. My initial instinct was to beat the holy shit out of her, to pound on her face and make her feel the pain I was feeling. Fortunately for everyone I used better judgment.





My dogs participate in a lot of pet events around Austin. They have a more active social life than some people I know. We love to go to charity events, meet-ups, walks, and occasional hikes at Turkey Creek. Now I feel like I will always be looking over my shoulder and bracing myself for something to happen. I can’t punish them for a freak accident, but it has definitely made me more cautious while outside. What am I supposed to do? Carry mace around with me? In my early 20s party girl phase, I carried a knife with me at all times in the event I got mugged while downtown or riding the bus. I don’t want to do that again, but I will if I have to. We know most of the dogs in our neighborhood and have never felt unsafe until now. Spike can be very weary around new people and he is a bit of a barker, but he really loves other dogs. He has never been aggressive or dominating with other dogs. He just wants to play and chase his ball. Hopefully this event does not change his pleasant disposition towards other dogs.





The only thing I can take away from this experience is that life can change in the blink of an eye. I urge all of you to hug your loved ones (furry & non-furry) a little tighter and tell them you love them. We often forget to do this and it takes a tragedy to remind us. Anything can happen when you do not expect it. I’d like to thank my amazing friends, family, and neighbors who offered a tremendous amount of support. Knowing I have so many people who care about us really helped me through this nightmare. Thanks again to the wonderful staff at the emergency hospital. Most importantly, thanks to Ross for literally risking his life to save Spike’s. We joke all the time that they are in constant competition with each other and that Ross begrudgingly accepted Spike into his world, but he really came through for us. Deep down I know they both love each other. I am forever indebted to Ross for what he did.




This week FrankenSpike got his staples removed and it’s like he’s a brand new dog. He’s back to barking at everything and chasing Zira around the house. We are all ready for Dogtober Fest on Saturday morning! We’ll be doing the DogtoberTrot to benefit local dog rescues. See you there!

Top Ten Guilty Pleasures

It took me a while to commit to this post. I go back and forth with guilty pleasures. I will admit I can be very opinionated about films and I do usually judge a person by their taste in cinema. However, everyone is entitled to enjoy whatever films they choose. There is no write or wrong opinion. I don’t think anyone should really feel guilty or embarrassed for genuinely enjoying a film, unless of course it’s the nü STAR WARS trilogy. By “guilty pleasure” standards, there are a few films I like that could fall into that category. As hard as it is to believe, I don’t always watch Palme D’ Or winners or Academy nominated features. Let me share a few of my guilty pleasures. Maybe it will inspire you to share yours and we can do away with this negative connotation assigned to “guilty pleasure” films. In no particular order:

HOTEL FOR DOGS
What can I say; I am a crazy dog lady. You know how some people will stop a mother with a stroller on the street to coo & ahh at their baby? I am just like that with dogs. As a result, I’m a sucker for any movie with a dog in it. I suffered through DUE DATE simply because I loved the adorable Frenchie in it. I actually really enjoyed SEVEN PSYCHOPATHS, but the cute Pomeranian made it all the more enjoyable. HOTEL FOR DOGS really got me. It’s a heartwarming story about a few kids who create a home for stray dogs. How can you not love that? And it has a pug! By the way, I own this film on Blu Ray.



HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL
I generally despise remakes, but I’m guilty of enjoying this one. I actually really like the original Vincent Price film. It was spooky and suspenseful without ever showing any gore as opposed to most horror films that are made today. I admit this is not a very good film and the ending leaves something to be desired. Nonetheless, my favorite aspect about it is the cast. There’s a cameo by the RE-ANIMATOR himself, Jeffrey Combs and everyone’s favorite vampire, James Marsters. The script is pretty weak, but the visual effects are really entertaining. I have resisted purchasing this film because I’m afraid to own up to it. I guess I just did.



BOOMERANG
I watched this film in the theater when I was just a kid with my sister. I thought it was the funniest thing I’d ever seen. You must admit it is a pretty good cast with Eddie Murphy, David Allen Grier, and Martin Lawrence. I guess it reminds me of the days of In Living Color. I have liked Robin Givens since her Head of the Class days. Also, coming of age at this time granted me an affinity for early 90s R&B which this soundtrack is riddled with. I’m really dating myself simply by the inclusion of this film.




GOOD WILL HUNTING
It took me a couple years to watch this film. It’s not necessarily the type of film that peaks my interest, although I do have a great amount of respect for Gus Van Sant. It came to me highly recommended from someone who knows my taste. I hated to admit that I actually enjoyed it. Again, this is a pretty brilliant cast even despite Minnie Driver. It was also one of the first dramatic roles I ever saw Robin Williams in. He did a fantastic job and his Oscar was well deserved. GOOD WILL HUNTING also shows what great writers Damon & Affleck are. This film also taught me not to always make assumptions about a film.




HOT TUB TIME MACHINE
I’m not crazy about comedies, but when they parody my favorite decade (1980s) I’m in. Like every other girl my age, I fell in love with John Cusack long ago, or should I say I fell in love with Lloyd Dobler. I was shocked that he even agreed to appear in a film like this. He seems a little embittered by his former heartthrob status. I love every reference and every single song from this film. I loved this film so much I saw it twice in the theater. Both times I was in tears laughing at Rob Corddry’s epic version of “Home Sweet Home.” This film is so much fun and I couldn’t be more excited for the sequel.




BREAKIN 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO
Lots of people reference this film and have never even seen it. It’s become a thing to cite “Electric Boogaloo.” I was completely mesmerized by this film as a child. I wanted to know exactly how the hell Turbo could dance on the ceiling. Turns out they used the same rotating room from A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET. They just don’t make films like this anymore. The type of feel good, community coming together, everyone wins in the end, type of film. BREAKIN 2 was way ahead of its time by showcasing interracial dating. It also highlighted a young edgy rapper long before he became Detective Fin Tutuola. BREAKIN 2 has a great soundtrack, awesome dance sequences, and incredible montages. How can you not love this film?




RATATOUILLE
For the most part, I despise animated feature films (with the exception of certain Japanese films). It used to make me feel really uneasy. Disney movies were the worst. Those early Disney films were pretty disturbing for a kid to watch. I have no problem with children’s cartoons, but I can’t bear to watch the films. I think the last Disney film I saw was THE LION KING. I happen to be at a friend’s house when his Disney obsessed little sister was watching RATATOUILLE. It caught my attention because I think rats are kind of cute (I slept with a Chuck E Cheese doll longer than I wish to admit). I found myself actually enjoying it. No one’s parents die, no animals die a horrible death, and there are no dancing hippos in tutus. If all Disney films were like this, I might actually give them a chance.




STEPBROTHERS
I’m conflicted over whether or not this is actually a guilty pleasure because it’s such a fantastic film. It made my “All Time Favorite Comedies” list. It has Academy nominated actor, John C. Reilly and the adorable Adam Scott. I am willing to debate anyone who disapproves of this film!




THE LEGEND OF BILLIE JEAN
This film holds a lot of sentimental value for me. It was actually filmed in the quaint coastal town I lived in when I was a kid. It’s great to watch it now and see all the things I loved about Corpus Christi like Padre Staples Mall and Ocean Drive. The film itself is pretty corny, but endearing. However, I applaud anything that promotes strong women. Although, it does come off very “Afterschool Special,” THE LEGEND OF BILLIE JEAN’s moral is to stand up for yourself. There are lots of interesting casting choices too like Lisa Simpson and Supergirl. This was also the film debut of Christian Slater who went on to become the bane of existence for every Jack Nicholson fan.




CALIGULA
Yes, I actually enjoy CALIGULA and not in an ironic way. I’m incredibly fascinated by ancient Roman history. Granted CALIGULA is not necessarily historically accurate, but it’s still a fun movie to watch. This film is a no holds barred depiction of one (perverted) man’s vision. Of course it’s filled with misogynistic tones, but the Roman Empire kind of invented misogyny. This is also an amazing cast of legendary actors like Peter O’Toole, Dame Helen Mirren, and the incomparable Malcolm McDowell. It’s ironic that the no name, Penthouse Pet turned actress was the one who sued Bob Guccione because the film’s hardcore sex scenes “tarnished her career/reputation.” You don’t see Dame Helen bitching about it; in fact she appears in interviews for the special edition DVD set (which I own). I think CALIGULA was ahead of it’s time. Nowadays it’s compared to films like SHOWGIRLS. It takes a certain personality to appreciate the tongue in check concept this film exudes. You either love it or you hate it.




HONORABLE MENTION
THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE (FIRST SEQUENCE)
I’m not guilty or embarrassed for enjoying HUMAN CENTIPEDE because it’s an awesome film. Again, it’s not the type of film that is for everyone. Director, Tom Six has a great appreciation for horror films and I really admire his “no rules” approach to filmmaking. He actually makes it fun. I’m also glad that we can make films like this today and that there’s an audience for it. Roger Ebert refused to assign a star rating for CENTIPEDE. He simply stated,

"[The film] is what it is and occupies a world where the stars don't shine."

I think that review is 100% medically accurate.




I felt it unnecessary to include John Hughes or Cameron Crowe films simply because everyone who grew up in that era loves those films and they should not be considered guilty pleasures. They’re just rite of passage films for a certain age group. Now you guys know all my secrets. Care to share any of yours?